THE GIFT OF THE MAGI . . . FOUR MONTHS EARLY

Let me tell you the story of a poor woman who proves that everyone has something to give and that you need not wait until Christmas to give it:

From childhood, Kathy Hilley has not enjoyed life’s advantages. Abuse and other circumstance well beyond her control, not the canard of “poorly made choices,” left her destitute and homeless.

What kindles a spark in someone like Kathy to overcome formidable obstacles and extract herself from poverty and despair? That is hard to say. A confluence of motivators that catch us unaware? A countervailing whisper from the depths of one’s conscience? A nascent sense that life must mean more than subsistence and dependency on someone else’s benevolence? Ours in not to analyze, but simply to celebrate, that for Kathy, the spark caught and became a flame.

As she sought, she found new sources of compassion that would support and encourage her gradual transition to a dignified and productive life. The Upstate Homeless Coalition of South Carolina has provided the counsel, transitional housing and instruction in life-skills that are building Kathy’s self-reliance.

Fortunately, her health problems were few, but her teeth and jaws had badly deteriorated. An incredible giving dentist has performed pro bono thousands of dollars of work on her mouth. Now she requires even more complicated dental work, likely costing beyond what this generous dentist can offer her gratis. A few folks have already stepped forth to help absorb the expense, but the prospect has left Kathy dejected.

Moreover, Kathy has never been anything but grateful, fully aware that even in her transition to independence she is the beneficiary of the kindness of caring people. She frequently laments that she has little substance from which to show her gratitude. What can she give?

One day recently, beset by the jumbled emotions of depression and inadequacy, she brought a “crazy” idea to her caseworker that she knew by instinct would restore her spirit – not drugs, nor binge drinking, nor any kind of self-destructive behavior, nor even licit self-indulgence.

You see, Kathy had luxuriously long hair. It was that lustrous, thick kind of hair that one could easily sell to a designer who would turn it into wigs and falls for haute couture. However, using her hair for personal gain was not the crazy idea. Kathy had heard of organizations that converted hair like hers into wigs for children, victims of cancer, who had lost their own hair due to chemotherapy. That is where she wanted her hair to go. That, she said, was the least that she could give back for all the kindness that has been shown to her.

So, the caseworker’s daughter, a cosmetologist, donated her time and skill to crop Kathy’s hair fashionably short. And, the caseworker sent it away to Locks of Love, where soon it will be made into wigs that will give kids who have suffered more than their share of pain and fear a little more reason to feel happy and whole.

When I heard this story, I cried, and I do not cry easily. We encouraged Kathy to let us tell this story and to make it real by using her given name. We convinced her not out of any desire for gratitude or glory. We live in a cynical world, we told her, where people blubbering about their victim-status strew our daily path. And, we simply wanted to use her story to underscore that it is still possible for a decent soul here and there to “get it,” to figure out that kindness must lead to greater kindness and that the most sublime gift is to give of one’s self.

Kathy Hilley is a real person. This is a real story. It is a stunning reminder that the gift of the Magi need not wait until the malls are decked with bows of holly. It is a stunning, yet unpretentious, reminder that the world may still be a place worthy of redemption. Thank you for renewing our hope.